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Your worth

I have not always, and I am still not, what anyone would consider a 'together' female. I became involved with my boyfriend when I was 17 years of age and he was emotionally abusive. Instead of leaving, I stayed with him, put up with the abuse and slept with other men (I never used protection). At approximatley, 23 years of age my boyfriend and myself travelled overseas. He was cruel on the trip and refused to talk to me most of the time - I once again handled this by sleeping with other men (once again not using protection!) I never thought about HIV, in fact, I really did not know much about it! I am well educated, as I have a PHD - I was just ignorant about the illness. When we arrived back from the trip, I learnt that he had been having sex with a sex worker and he was not using protection. I still thought nothing about this and coped with the abuse by having sex with other men (unprotected!) It was not until three years later that I confessed to having sex with other men to my friend that she explained the risk of having HIV. I thought that if I had HIV I would lose weight instantly and so forth - how wrong I was - people do not even know they have the illness!!!!!!!!! I was tested and so was my boyfriend and by some miracle our results came back NEGATIVE! Six months later we were tested again..... yes ....... NEGATIVE!!! A lot has changed since we found out we are negative - we started counselling - he worked on not being emotionally abusive, I worked on not using sex to cope with issues and things are much brighter today! I just want young people to know that using sex to solve their problems or attempt to increase their self-esteem is not the best way to do it!!! I know that we are lucky, very lucky to be negative! Please be safe - use protection - sleeping with someone could cost you a lot! You are worth more than that!

 

Sent via Email, February 16, 2005 from Australia.

 
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