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Interview with Evan

HOW LONG HAVE YOU HAD HIV EVAN?

17 years.  I will really celebrate when I hit the 20 year anniversary.  I am so proud of the accomplishments I have made while fighting this at the same time.  I have traveled the world.  I have worked hard through a lot of pain and illness caused mostly by the meds.   I have had lipodystrophy because of the meds but that has reversed with the dawn of better medication.  I am in perfect health now.

 

HOW DID YOU AQUIRE HIV? 

Through sex with a man.  I was dating a girl at the time.  We had an open relationship.  We were both bi.   I actually got HIV the first time having full-on sex with a guy.  It was a fling (hook-up).  He was a kid who use to live across from me in a place called "The Attention Home" .   I met him at the club where I DJ'd.   I was very scared...he wanted to have butt sex and I said "NO!"  he talked me into it.  He said "Can I take off the condom?"  I said "NO!"  He did anyhow.  I was too much of a push over at the time...being 20 years old.  I have since forgiven myself and him.

 

WAS THAT RAPE?

By definition, some say yes.  If you tell someone NO!  -- they should stop and not ask for more.  He never physically forced himself on me....I let him.    I guess he  shares in the responsibility of giving me HIV/AIDS but at the time I took full responsibility (thinking God was punishing me) and I refused to tell doctors the name of the person who gave it to me.
Back then it could be considered murder since we all thought we'd die and some where going to prison for it.  I never identified him to anyone...he died of AIDS a couple of years after giving it to me.  Sad. 

DO YOU HAVE AIDS OR HIV?

Technically I have AIDS.  In Canada I have HIV.  LOL, true….My tcells dropped below 200 in 1996 giving me the official AIDS diagnosis.  It’s just on paper.
Doesn’t mean anything.

Have you ever been hospitalized for HIV-AIDS related illnesses?

No.

Have you ever been sick because of HIV/AIDS?

No…well, the meds have made me sick….sometimes I wonder if there really is such a thing. LOL    I think we are all way off on this one but only time will tell.   HIV/AIDS has never hurt me but the meds sure have.

 

WHY ARE YOU COMING OUT ABOUT YOUR HIV/AIDS?

My pioneer spirit and  I am doing a documentary on an AIDS website.  I am also getting more involved with LA Shanti, Being Alive and APLA.  I want my friends to know....most of them do already.   Andy Bell of Erasure inspired me.  He came out about him having it.
 I wrote him a letter and hand delivered it to him when he was in LA....thanking him for giving me courage.  You can be hot and sexy with HIV, hell yeah! I want to give that message to people newly diagnosed.

Have you ever been discriminated against? 

You should have seen when I came out about my HIV to a Mormon dentist office in Idaho.  LOL   They almost refused to clean my teeth.  Bastards.  After putting on  10 pairs of gloves and a space suit...they agreed to clean my teeth.  That was hard but I laugh about it now.  Also,  I got into a yelling match with the "God hates Fags' group when they showed up at the AIDS Walk in Washington DC.  That was funny.  I got into it again with them at Pride in LA.  Those haters really like hanging around us.  Who wouldn't?

 

DO YOU PROMOTE ABSTINANCE?

NO.  Just protect yourself.

 

WHY COME OUT ABOUT HIV THIS WAY?

Why not?  Not personal?  Don't have time to talk to everyone....I am actually over it after 17 years...I moved on emotionally years ago.  It is troubling some times to come out to everyone individually because they either get sad or feel uncomfortable.  It is not a sad thing.  Just life.

 

DO YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND?

I want one but I am too busy, and I like girls too.  I called myself gay for years.  It was weird, when I became HIV pos, I thought, well, now I have to be gay.
 Lately I have gone back to how I really feel and that I could fall in love with a man or a woman.  Inever liked limits on that sort of thing.  Equipment is just a side thing.  I see some really frickin' hot chicks and yeah…if they are cool with my status….ok…not all about sex….in fact I think sex is highly overrated.  Cuddling is more fun for me. 

 

Do you worry about spreading HIV/AIDS?

Yes, I have before.  I gave it to two guys  through unprotected sex.  It was hard to live with myself.  I was even suicidal for a while because of the guilt of passing the virus.  That was the most difficult feeling I have ever dealt with.  So ashamed, felt so little.  I read a book by Luis B. Hay “How to Heal your Life”.  I forgave myself.  I also was veryinfluenced by “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle.

 

DID ALCOHOL OR DRUGS HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU
GETTING OR GIVING HIV?

Yes,  I have had problems with alcohol and drugs throughout my life.  I have been completely sober for almost 2 years now ...if you don't count the occasional joint.

 

DO YOU USE PROTECTION WITH OTHER PEOPLE NOW?

Don't really have sex that much anymore.  LOL  Yes, I use a condom.  I didn't with my last boyfriend – he was positive too and we both chose not to despite the other dangers.

 

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE TOO HONEST?

The truth sets me free.  You should try it. 

 

HOW HAVE YOU SURVIVED HIV/AIDS FOR 17 YEARS?

Good question. 

 

FAITH. 

IS YOUR FAMILY SUPPORTIVE?

Somewhat….I guess.  Not really an issue because I have never been really sick.  Some family members made homophobic remarks years ago….but they got some violent tongue lashings from me.  They only have nice things to say now.   My sister Wendy would have to be my biggest supporter out of the whole family…even more than mom.  She has had some hard things in her life which makes her relate.

 

ARE YOU WORRIED ABOUT YOUR SUCCESS IN HOLLYWOOD BEING
OUT WITH HIV?

No.  I am a pioneer.  Survivors don't worry.  I am Buddhist and live in the now.  To worry about the future or past is living unconsciously.  Living in the past just makes you bitter.  I do what's best in the moment...what is best for my body and mind at this very moment then everything seems to come in a good way.  I help others by taking good care of myself.

 

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOD?

Yes. Not an external god sitting up there in a cloud.  God is in me.  I take full responsibility.

 

WHAT ABOUT THE BIBLE?

Some of it.

 

THE DEVIL?

Hell no.  LOL  Now that is just sick!  Trying to scare people into doing good?  What moron came up with that concept?  Very dumb.  I hate fear tactics.  Don’t be fooled by them.

 

ANY HEALTH TIPS TO OTHER HIV PEOPLE?

Eat organic, detoxify, avoid processed and foods containing hydrogenated oils, drink bottled water...lots, love humans and animals, protect our planet from evil corporations, exercise, be a spiritual person, get sexual, have fun, be responsible, take one day just having fun, take your anger out on injustice, be anti-war, be creative, do yoga, be honest, respect others, breathing techniques, pay no attention to age,,,,take hikes in nature...make lots of friends.....be totally honest, but above all, take good care of yourself first....then you can help others.

 

WHAT ELSE?

Listen to my new song “Another One Bites the Dust” (they can’t phunk wit us) at thegenerix.com I am on vocals here.  Freddie Lives

Evan                    

  http://www.thegenerix.com   
  
  Music streamlined and Wisdom in text section: http://www.broadjam.com/thegenerix
  
  or myspace at:  http://www.myspace.com/thegenerix27
 

Sent via Email July 30, 2006 from United States.

 
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