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Abstinance

Hello everyone. Well let me start out by saying If it was not for this site and encouragement I would have never gotten tested. Well to start out my story I always was permiscouis(sp?) I was with men who were high risk but back then when you are in those situation you don't think of that or you think they seem clean. But after I settled down and stayed away from sex it started to enter the back of my mind this went on for about 15 years and I was always afraid to get tested and I was always afraid of hearing if I was HIV Pos or HIV neg but yet at times I would risk the risky behavior. I had then gone 5 years without any kind of sexual relations then after 5 years I got into 2 relationships where both men were extremely sexually active, after the last one which was abusive I finally left.

 

Now since then I have never had any kind of sex it has been 4 years now. But one day i had a bad cold and a terrible sinus infection that took a while to get rid of but the antibiotics did help, I like many of you on here had all the symptoms of HIV, i had the fever, body aches, dizziness, diarrhea may have had strept throat with it and 2 weeks later a rash that looked like bug bites which went away within 4 days of taking claritin I pretty much diagnosed my self being HIV pos.. I paniced so bad I went on line to look up all the info. then found this site, I could not get in until 2 weeks so that did not help seens how I was so desperate to find out. Oh by the was let me mentions after my abusive relationship I turned my life over to Christ so I prayed so hard and so much during this time, I pray everyday but not like this. So today 10/12/06 is a day I enjoyed life and appreciated like never before I got tested and she told me everthing was fine and there were no antibodies, I went in the car and cried of happiness.

 

I know a lot of you who found out you were negative may say or have read you say "next time I am gonna be more careful and practice safe sex" but imo abstinance is the only way to go and I will tell you why, an old girlfriend of mine slept with a man she found out later was dying of Aids and she told me the condom had a tare and she was worried but I believe she was negative I hope. If I can go 5 years then another 4 without any sex I believe you guys can too and I am a very sexual person.

 

Please to all those who are afraid to get tested please get tested and don't wait til you get sick like I was gonna do and thanks to everyone on here I finally did it. Replace sex and put our Lord Jesus Christ in place of it and have faith. To all those who are HIV pos. I will be praying for you and that you will have the stregnth to make it through this hard road. God bless everyone!

 

Sent via Email September 13, 2006.

 
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