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A healthy life

I want to start off this story, just to help others who maybe are trying to figure out whether to have sex unprotected or not. I am a 29 year old African American female, who at the age of 20 became sexually active. I had sex with with 4 partners, two protected and two unprotected by the age of 26. I met this guy, who was the sweetest guy you could ever meet. College educated, just as I am. I knew about HIV, so when I got with him, I asked him to go and take a test with me at a local clinic. We had already had sex once unprotected. It was hard to ask him to do this because of course the first thing he said was, I am clean and you don't trust me. Well the test was negative for us both and we discussed the last time we had sex with other people, and it was before the window period, so the test was good. We both went into the room together to hear each others results. Well, from this one time unprotected encounter, I ended up getting herpes from this guy. I felt betrayed or something, but honestly, I do not think he knew he had it. That was my first time taking a herpes test too, even though I had been tested for other STDs before, annually taking an HIV and physical. It was only because the herpes was not dormant, so I probably got it from him or probably not. I later became distant from him because of this and we eventually broke up. Now, I am 29 and always try to sit down with my partner to discuss previous partners, sexual risks, and ask them to get an HIV test. I also ALWAYS USE CONDOMS with the men I go with. I put the condom on my self and yes check it intermittently as we have sex. If we stop for an hour or so. I ask him to put another one on. I have my own supply of condoms. I have never had a guy who has refused to use a condom with me. I have gotten a couple of guys who said, no, they were not going to take a test with me. I felt like if they did not care about being tested and about my status, I of course will not risk my life for them. Please stay safe ladies and sometimes you think that a guy will walk out on you if you ask him to take a test and/or you will be alone and you will loose him to someone else. But think of it this way, you may loose him, but you will not loose a healthy life. Always use condoms even after testing. We all make mistakes, but many of us get second, third, and fourth chances. TAKE them and make the best choice for yourself and/or your children. thanks

 

Sent via Email January 16, 2007 from Chicago, USA.

 
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