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What its like


I am 48 years old and am hiv positive. I've known since 1998.
This happened through a blood transfusion in Rhodesia now Zimbabwe.

It was a choise i made that i regreted sinse. After that transfusion a year later i had a lovely daughter and shes negative. After i had my daughter my husband had a vicectomy done since then i never used any contraseptives I had no need. Seven years i started beeing sick with flue and would go on for a long time with antibiotics and all sorts to get better sores on my boddy that took too long to heal.


I asked my family doctor for a hiv test. He started loughing he said he had more chance of having than I. But i did it and was positive did it again and positive was. It was a shock to the doctor and i. So i went home devastaited and told my husband he also got tested and so my daughters. They where all negative. Its been now 23 years had my ups and downs MY HASBAND stood by me all does years and its been our secret. Now my husband died of cancer in the colon three months and he was gone. Now I have told my daughters and they are very understanding they care and love me. And i love them. Now its just us. His side of the family suspect that i have Aids I never told them what as my problem just used to say it was a my imunity was very low and i would pick up colds anf flue very easy. Now that my husband died they just telling people that hes son didint just die of cancer but i gave him my sickness. I dont know how they gonna react when thy find the truth that i am positive.

Just to let other woman out there know they are not alone.

It is a terrible feeling not beeing able to talk to people. Unfortunatley there are so many people blind about hiv. Well i just hope they will never know whats like having it.


Sent via Email November 4, 2008 from Portugal.

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